Just Another Manic Monday

Just for your entertainment, I will enlighten you on my early Monday morning.

Just so you understand the full picture, here is a little background information on my neighborhood. When I found out I might be moving to Montgomery I sent out feelers to several friends on where I should live. From the phone calls, emails, facebook updates and texts- I was told by all to live in the Old Cloverdale area of Montgomery. So, on a trip to Montgomery I had a very sweet old lady realtor take me (what I found out was the long way) to a very cute apartment. Don't get me wrong, I love my apartment! It is perfect for me and I am in Old Cloverdale - Garden District right? Well, the ghetto side. But, we all know I couldn't live anywhere where I wouldn't have craziness to be able to update you on.

As the realtor would say, I have a beautiful grassy fenced in backyard with my apartment. What I would say is that I have a side yard that I have to come out of my front door and outside to get into.

After pressing snooze for the third time this morning Miss Mia started barking which meant she needed to go outside pretty badly.

So, I rolled straight out of bed- eyes half shut out the front door and into the fenced in yard. Within seconds the wind blows and slams the gate hard leaving Sarah and Mia locked in the backyard.

Yes, for the second time since I have moved in, I am locked in the backyard.

For some really dumb reason there is not a handle on the inside gate of the fence and yes, calling the landlord is still on my to do list from last time.

So, what are my options here?

First- I kick the gate hard. As hard as I could- nothing.

Second I climb onto the gate and try to bend down and reach the lock- believe it or not my arms were not long enough.

Third- I go and find the perfect stick to help climb back onto the gate and try to open the fence.- Still nothing.

So, I look down at my outfit. I am wearing a tank top with no bra and gaucho pants.

Yes, gaucho pants the ones I actually wore in public 6 years ago (they make perfect pajama pants) they are black and covered and I mean covered in white Mia hair. They are honestly a little bit big and I have nothing on under them

and lets not forget that I have on ski socks and clogs

and last but not least I still have a mouth guard in my mouth.

So, I decide that climbing over the fence into the front of the house with the chance of leaving the pants on the fence was probably not the best idea and I walk to the back of the fence which will leave me to have to walk around the block to get to the front door.

I climb onto the fence and leap for it.

Somehow I made it.

No bruises, no scrapes and I still have all of my clothes on.

Kind of proud of myself, I walk from behind my house and the neighbors to the side street.

Just in time to be able to walk side by side with the man down the street who likes to push wheelchairs.

Yes, he is old and skinny and pushes wheelchairs.

So, I say, "Good Morning!" with my lisp from the mouth guard and he looks at me like I'm crazy. He is the one pushing the wheelchair, but apparently I'm the crazy one.

So, we walk the rest of the way in silence side -by- side down the sidewalk around the corner and back to my front door.

He keeps going and I open the stupid -stupid gate, grab Mia and go inside to get ready for work.